Importance of Writing a Birth Plan

While this might seem like something for your wife to do, it's important that you, as a supporting cast member, be very involved in making the decisions now on how labor and delivery will unfold.

Some decisions must be your wife's alone, like whether to have an epidural or allow for an episiotomy, and in those cases, your role is to be supportive of her decision. But there are other decisions that may even fall uniquely to you as well.

Do you want to "catch" the baby as he comes out? Do you want to cut the umbilical cord (sometimes also an option for mom)? Some of these questions will be easier than others, but consider: Will you allow the staff to provide formula milk, which may interfere with the start of breastfeeding? Do you want your new baby to lie on mommy's chest as soon as possible after birth? Will you allow videos or photos taken during delivery? It is very important that you and mom-to-be write all these decisions down and discuss them openly so there is no difference of opinion in the delivery room, either with the hospital staff, and especially between you and your partner.

Make sure to provide a copy of this plan to your doctor and bring one to the hospital to put in your records.

Your spouse will soon be approaching her due date. The actual event of birth can always spring some surprises when you least expect them. Drawing up a birth plan that clearly lists your preferences and expectations will help you handle emergencies better.

These are some typical questions, the answers to which will help you draw up a birth plan. Some concern issues that require both you and your spouse to decide upon jointly. The others may be left for the mother alone to state her preferences-in consultation with her obstetrician if so required. Be ready to offer your suggestions if she asks for them, though.

Questions for mom and dad

• How would you prefer your baby's heartbeat to be monitored?
• Should you, as the dad, be the one to cut the umbilical cord?
• Will you opt for cord-blood banking for your baby?
• Would you want a pacifier for your baby after birth?
• Do you want your baby, if a boy, to be circumcised?

Questions only for mom

• Should the delivery take place at home, at a birth center, or in a hospital?
• Whom would she prefer to have around her during the delivery?
• Would she prefer to take medication to manage pain? If so, which?
• Should she be given fluids intravenously, or would she prefer to drink them orally?
• Would she prefer to have a mirror, in position before her, to enable her to see the baby being born?
• Would she prefer breastfeeding? If so, would she prefer to nurse immediately after delivery?
• Should your older children, if any, be present in the hospital after the delivery?
• How long would she prefer to stay in the hospital?